What is a Manuscript Critique?
The manuscript critique: a sub-step of the editing process. But what is a manuscript critique, when should you get one, and what are the differences between a manuscript critique and a developmental edit?
- Manuscript Editing
- August 23, 2023
Whether self-publishing or through a traditional publishing house, a manuscript must undergo a series of editing steps (developmental editing, line editing, copyediting, and proofreading) before public consumption. Today, we discuss and evaluate a sub-step of editing that can occur before publication—a manuscript critique. Of course, this step is not mandatory but recommended under specific circumstances.
What is a Manuscript Critique?
A manuscript critique (or editorial assessment) is a valuable review of your work and includes a report of your finished (and unfinished) manuscript. As one editor explains in her blog, the manuscript critique is a “tough love letter from the editor to the author.”
During the read, an editor takes copious notes on every section. The types of questions an editor considers include:
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- Does the story have a backbone? Is the author building on it or missing the mark somehow?
- Does the timeline work? If not, is this due to the time it takes for the story to unfold or something else entirely?
- How is the pace of the narrative?
- How is the plot progressing?
- Is the genre clear? If not, which genres appear in the story, and do they work well together?
- Is the writing style used suitable for the genre? If not, how might we make it so?
- What does each character offer the overall story? What are the specific dynamics between characters?
- What other primary components (or elements) of the story does the author need help with?
- What writing style does the author adopt?
- Where does the story take place? What are the primary locations (or settings) for each scene?
- Who is the antagonist? Is the more than one or various contenders?
- Who is the protagonist? Is there more than one?
Using these notes, an editor designs a 5–15-page style sheet (an editor’s style sheet) that divides into various topics.
Unfinished manuscripts are usually more difficult for editors and pose more risk for the author than a finished manuscript. Why? Unfinished manuscripts require an editor to think more deeply about where the story might be heading versus an author’s definitive conclusion in a finished manuscript. Furthermore, the number of questions and comments posed for an unfinished work might overwhelm an author.
Authors may seek a manuscript critique at any time during the writing process (including after other types of editing). An author who sends an unfinished manuscript to an editor might do so if they are unsure whether a story hides within the pages written or the work is worth keeping.
When to Pursue a Manuscript Critique
Authors may have an assortment of reasons for being doubtful about their drafts, including:
- Budget concerns.
- Curiosity about the potential commercial value.
- Questions about whether the story is worth writing.
- Suspicions the manuscript is not ready for a developmental edit but still wants feedback.
- Where to go next with the story.
- Worries about the word count.
- Worries the novel is not good enough for a publishing house.
If the author faces these doubts, then a manuscript critique might be just what the doctor ordered.
Manuscript Critiques vs. Developmental Editing
A manuscript critique can occur at any time and supplies a holistic (and broad) opinion about the entire piece. Similarly, a developmental edit evaluates the same areas of interest but on a much deeper level. A developmental editor helps restructure the material into a readable and engaging product.
A developmental editor assesses (1) character developmental issues; (2) dialogue concerns; (3) how the author organizes the piece; (4) potential plot holes; (5) the point of view used; (6) the story’s pace; and (7) whether to add, remove, or expand specific ideas.
The types of questions developmental editors ask themselves include:
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- Do the manuscript’s voice, style, and format match genre expectations?
- Does the author apply a coherent viewpoint? Is it consistent? Does it make sense for the story?
- Does the author use a consistent approach to character development?
- Does the overall structure of the book make sense?
- Is the narrative technique used correctly?
Pricing for each type of editing will vary. However, a manuscript critique is among the least expensive processes and much cheaper than a full developmental edit.
An editor considers the word count, whether the story is a fiction or nonfiction piece, and the expected turnaround time within the pricing structure of their proposals. Longer manuscripts take more time (as expected). Fiction and nonfiction novels require different areas of examination. And turnaround time is always based on the author’s publishing process or publishing house’s expectations (if applicable).
Recent Manuscript Critique (Example)
In March of 2022, I completed a manuscript critique for an author. While visiting my mother-in-law and friends in Chewelah (an hour north of Spokane, WA), I had a face-to-face discussion with an author looking for an editor. She had finished six chapters and knew where she wanted to go with the story but was unsure whether it was worth reading or trying to publish. After studying only five pages, I could see the potential and where she might run into trouble. After further discussion, we agreed I would complete a manuscript critique of her chapters.
The author knew I was very forthright and rarely held things back (based on prior interactions over the years). Consequently, she asked that my evaluation be as thorough as possible. She wanted various ideas, questions, recommendations, and things to consider. So, due to the unfinished nature of the document, my assessment ended up being fifteen (15) pages long. Although initially overwhelmed, she was pleased with the results.
With the author’s permission, the extracts below come from my manuscript critique of those six chapters. To protect her privacy and that of her story, I have changed the names of each character.
The Manuscript Critique Style Sheet has nineteen sections; therefore, I briefly explain what I was looking for and provide readers with a sampling of the comments, recommendations, questions, and things sent to the author for consideration.
Opening Remarks
The opening remarks clarify the reason for completing the critique and explain my job as an editor. Here are the exact words I started the manuscript critique with:
This assessment focuses on large-scale issues found within the six chapters. My job is to evaluate the manuscript and offer ideas to improve the material for the average reader while helping you express your story as simply as possible.
General Synopsis
A general synopsis is a brief statement (or summary) about the manuscript. Again, I changed the names to give privacy to the author.
After sixteen years as an appellate attorney, Richard Martin decides he cannot continue working mundane cases for the rest of his life. He wants to stand out from his colleagues and gain the recognition he feels he deserves. He wants something that catches his interest and wakes him up once more.
Two new cases in the pipeline connect in more ways than he suspects and draw him into a conspiracy of insurance fraud, lies, courtroom drama, and murder. Little does he know how quickly a desire for something new can go amiss.
Although a bit out of my wheelhouse due to the genre, I still found the information intriguing. How he responds to the new cases (and their participants) directly affects his life and those he loves.
Overview
The overview is like the synopsis but gives more detail about the story. I gave my client the following:
In sixty-four pages, the audience learns who the primary and secondary characters are, their backgrounds, and the events that lay the foundation for how their lives intersect.
The protagonist is desperate for a change. He wants to recast his life and craves something that excites his imagination and brings recognition. He wants to feel alive, to have a purpose once more. A letter from the developer of his home offers a chance to put his plan into action.
There are three (3) options for the primary antagonist: (1) Michael Waters, (2) Oleksandr (Olek) Nikita, and (3) an as-yet-unknown “boss” of Olek who runs a real estate development scheme throughout California (and potentially other states as well).
The chances of Michael being the antagonist are improbable due to the information given within the first two chapters. An unidentified “boss” running a real estate development scheme in the United States appears unlikely (but we cannot know for now). The strongest candidate for our antagonist is Olek. But why?
Oleksandr Nikita has the following points against him:
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- An unsavory reputation for doing things off-book.
- He continually asks Lada to give his “friends” free insurance policies after she issues one.
- A questionable past (as described in chapter four).
- Connections to a real estate development scheme through his “friends.”
Based on these points, what follows assumes Olek is the primary antagonist for all characters involved.
Story Arc
A book’s story arc is how the story progresses in the novel. The development of each character (whether protagonist or antagonist) is essential. Each character must change, whether minutely or significantly. Yet, to get to that transformation, we must know how the characters began. One way to help with this is to create a timeline that shows where and when they first appear and what happens for them throughout the novel.
Due to the sheer number of characters introduced, plus the multitude of dates that were difficult to keep track of, I created a separate timeline for each primary and secondary character. Then, I combined the information into what I call a Master Timeline.
To generate the timeline, I used the approximate dates given (calculated based on specific dates shown in the manuscript and when scenes occurred), the page number the information appeared on, and what happened on that date. The timeline ended up being five pages long (although it could have been shorter).
The part of the timeline I show below explains to the author why I believe Richard has been an attorney for longer than the story implies:
Manuscript Critique Example
| Approx. Date | Pages | Scenario |
|---|---|---|
| Richard starts working at Carey Grace and Hollis (CGH). | ||
| ≈ 1991 | 23 | Barry marries Vivian (his legal assistant). |
| ≈ 1993 | 24 | Vivian becomes pregnant with this first child after two years of marriage. |
| • Richard starts pulling 2,650+ billable hours a year to make a good living, pay off his student loans, and make a bonus. | ||
| ≈ 1994 | 25 | Bethany Jewel (B. J.) is born. |
| ≈ 2002 | 26 | Aaron Charlie is born. |
| • Ferris Brice Handelman and Damiano (FBHD) hires Richard as a junior partner. | ||
| • The new job with FBHD gives Richard more time to spend with his now eight-year-old daughter when before he was mostly absent from her life. | ||
| • Richard’s position gives Vivian more time with her baby and husband, as he does not have to accumulate as many billable hours in a year and is home more (although not usually until after 7 PM). | ||
| Friday, March 2010 | 2–3 | Richard decides his future. |
| 4 | • Richard obtains a new George Michael case | |
| 9–11 | • During the conversation, George briefs Richard on another [non-related according to George] case he might need to fight. | |
| 27–30 | • Barry returns home early to find his wife and daughter arguing and a half-naked teenage boy running down his driveway. | |
| Saturday, March 2010 | 44–45 | Richard and Vivian discuss her argument with B. J. |
| • Richard learns Vivian does not know about the boy and decides against telling her. | ||
| 46–48 | • Richard tells B. J. her punishment and that her mother does not know about the teenage boy . . . yet. | |
| 48–51 | • Barry comes across a letter about defective construction projects he believes he can successfully argue (SB 800 statute). | |
| • Richard uses B. J. to help while he investigates other cases with similar issues about construction defects. |
NOTE:
The timeline for Richard being a lawyer is incorrect; the numbers are not adding up. Based on my calculations, he should have been a lawyer for 17–18 years if B. J. was sixteen and conceived two years after he and Vivian married.
- Of course, when he started at CGH, we do not know how long they worked together before they fell in love and married.
- Moreover, Page 4 states that Richard and Irene Ferris worked together on cases for ten (10) years, while Page 26 states Richard spent eight (8) years getting to know his daughter, even though the girl was already eight (8) years old when he started at FBHD.
Of course, my calculations above could be wrong, but only the author will know if this is true. The editor’s job is to point the information out and leave it up to the author to change or ignore each recommendation.
Setting
A story’s setting is “when” the story takes place (which year) and “where.” For this critique, I took care of the when part (March 2010) during the story arc, so I do not duplicate it here. However, I note which locations we know about from the six chapters:
Based on the information in the first six chapters, we know of two primary geographical locations: California and Barbados.
Michael Waters opened CAUB in Barbados, but we have little information on where the office is or the number of people working for him.
We do not know the location of George Michael’s brokerage office (the presumption is California, but that is not necessarily a given). We also do not know from where UGIG is flying.
The remaining locations (homes, businesses, and courthouses) are in California.
Pacing & Tension
A story’s pace is how quickly the story unfolds, while tension describes the suspense a reader feels about the unknown (i.e., what will happen next). The speed and anticipation within the six chapters were all over the place. I tried to explain this as clearly as possible:
Within the current timeline (i.e., March 2010), the pacing works well for Richard Martin.
The information for Michael (as shown in the above timeline) appears in spurts and is hard to follow.
- Chapter 1—We learn Michael is missing when George Michael tells Richard Martin about a potential case. We have no idea how long Michael has been missing.
- Chapter 2—We learn way too much at one time (1) the background of who Fred is, (2) what he decides to do after his last divorce, (3) how he meets Lada, (4) their first year of marriage, (5) the issue with vodka and Lada turning physically abusive, (6) Olek’s introduction, and (7) the insurance programs Lada screws up.
- Chapter 4—We learn when he first meets Charlette Nichols in Barbados.
- Chapter 6—We get more information on (1) his working relationship with Charlotte Nichols, (2) what he decides to do after settling with his neighbor, (3) the riches he earns over the next [two] years, and (4) that he disappears after the confrontation with Charlotte. [between a month and six months, as shown on pages 54 and 64].
Strengths
A manuscript’s strengths (or what works well) are essential for authors looking to update or improve their stories. Although unfinished, the author has included the correct amount of background detail for Richard (the protagonist), the relationship between him and his family, and a judge’s quick (but crucial) introduction.
The description of Judge Bailey and how he runs his courtroom and daily calendar is fascinating. I look forward to “meeting” him later in the novel.
The introduction of the judge and his quirks will presumedly play heavily in the future.
Spelling, Punctuation, & Grammar
A manuscript critique is not the place to correct an author’s spelling, punctuation, or grammar. However, it is a suitable place to bring up potential difficulties for either the current editor or any future one the author may hire.
The primary problems below concern the level and amount of the Russian language used in the novel with Michael Waters’ wife, Lada. (The author is not Russian herself.) Here is a brief extract from this section:
- I do not read or speak Russian, so verifying the sentences will take a while to decipher.
- Chicago gives conflicting information on the material, so I will need to do other research on the best way to present the Russian language in the novel.
- I do not believe that the translations given are necessary to the story; they supply context for what Lada is screaming, but having the translations at once following the Russian words distracts the scene.
NOTE: While I need to complete research on the Russian language, the proper location for the translations may be as a footnote or at the end of the chapter. I do not, in any way, think the entire section needs to go. If Olek is a Russian landscape architect, he will also speak Russian. Where the translations need to be (if at all) will be something we can discuss later.
There appears to be a combination of American- and British-English quotations used in the manuscript.
The final comment about the quotations is crucial for the author to know, as she will need to pick one and stick to it in the future. But that job of reminding her occurs later during the copyediting phase.
Worldbuilding
Worldbuilding is such a crucial part of the novel writing process that it is both loved and hated by authors across the globe. Too much description or information (in one place or about one person) and the reader quickly loses interest. Too little information gives the reader a sense of viewing a cartoon stick figure instead of a place or person.
The author did well in certain places but needed work in others:
The best worldbuilding descriptions in the first six chapters center around the Valley Oaks Business Center, Jacob Oxford’s neighborhood on the border of Sherman Oaks and Chatsworth, and Charlotte Nichol’s new office.
We have a scant description of the FBHD office, even though Richard explains why he unwillingly leaves at night.
We do not have descriptions for the remaining locations mentioned.
We also do not have physical descriptions for most of the characters mentioned.
Readers want to know what the characters they are reading about look like, even if they are ugly and may cause nightmares.
Character Development
Character development makes fictional characters as “real” as possible for the reader by developing their motivations, internal depth, and complex personalities that change throughout the story’s progress. I concentrated on a selection of individuals within the critique:
You have developed Vivian’s motivations well. She understands how the industry works regarding lawyers and their penchant for marrying (and divorcing) their first and second wives and has no intention of falling into the divorcee category. We know she stays home with her children, but what does she do? Is she involved in school activities, PTA, and bake sales? Does she join the ladies for a game of cribbage on occasion? What are the other activities in her life? What kind of life does she lead, separate from her family?
Michael’s personality needs more work. We see his motivations and intention to keep Lada around for as long as possible. The idea that he would forge the information sent to UGIG reinforces the perception that he will do anything to get ahead in life [at least, that was what I got from reading his personality]. If that means he needs to lie, steal, and cheat, so be it. But at what cost? Is it his love for Lada that motivates him? Is there an underlying issue of which we are unaware? Is there something in his psyche that believes he should accept Lada’s treatment of him without a fight?
Lada needs more details. Based on the description given of the woman in chapter two, Lada will do anything to get ahead in life, even if it means beating her husband into submission and inviting a dangerous man and his “friends” into the fold.
However, the primary question here revolves around how she knows Olek. The information printed out by Jacob in chapter four notes Lada and Kolya as known associates of Olek. Does this mean she is related to Olek in some way? B. J. claims in chapter five that Kolya is waiting for his uncle to visit the town. The apparent presumption is that Olek is his uncle unless it happens to be one of his “friends,” which I doubt. The audience will doubt this, too. What is the exact relationship between Lada and Olek? When is Kolya brought to the United States by Michael? What was he at first living with his sister and then note? What happened?
Characterization
The characterization of the protagonists and antagonists (and even secondary characters) is how the author reveals the distinct personalities of everyone. Within the six chapters, certain characters drove me crazy as an editor and reader, which I knew would do the same for other readers. Therefore, I posed a series of questions for the author to consider while working on these characters. Here is a brief look at those questions:
Chapter four introduces Jacob Oxford and gives the audience a glimpse of who he is and his motivation in life. How does this eventually play out? Does his research become central to the case, or is he a filler character used simply for background details we would have received later?
The little information we know about Olek is frustrating. When did he arrive in the United States? How is he related to Lada? Is he truly Koyla’s uncle? How much of a danger is he to Lada and Michael? How much of a risk is he to Richard and his family? Was he the one to kill Charlotte? If so, how would he have known about her? What connection does he have to other potential construction defect cases?
In chapter six, we meet Melissa, the office manager for Charlotte Nichols’ company. How involved will she be in this case with UGIG now that Charlotte is dead? What ends up happening to the woman and Charlotte’s company?
Conflicts
A story must have conflict or a struggle between forces or people. Within the manuscript, I came across potential conflicts that could arise between specific characters and both cases that plague Richard’s mind. Here is a selection of the conflicts I saw while reading.
Richard and Olek
The elephant in the room is how intricately linked Olek is to Richard’s new SB 800 construction defect case. Was Olek involved, or was it simply his “friends” that did the shoddy work? Could Olek threaten Richard in some way? What about his family? How does this play out in the end? And will everyone be alive at the end? Because the audience already believes that Olek’s danger meter is in the red. This new case of Richard’s might break the gauge.
Richard and FBHD
If the George Michael case moves ahead (which appears likely), and Richard’s new construction defect case ties in somehow (which also seems probable), will Irene or another senior partner try to force Richard to recuse himself? Will they insist they take the cases over, using the excuse of George Michael being a frequent client?
Will Richard stand for this toe-stepping or decide to leave FBHD and open a rival firm? How will this go over with all the senior partners? Will some support or will all turn against him? These questions are important because we only know of Irene Ferris but have no information on the remaining partners. What kind of relationship do they have with Richard?
Consistency
Consistency in a story is essential. Within the six chapters, I came across two distinct levels of information. First, there was an extraordinary amount of background information. And second, there were hardly any current details (outside of what we learned about Richard and his new case). To help the author flesh things out, I asked a series of questions for her to consider:
How has Lada changed since the last time we read about her? Has she become more conniving, or is she working with Olek in other ways not hinted at before? What are her current feelings about her husband? Does she see him as weak and assume she can continue treating him a particular way without eventual consequences? Has she disappeared with Michael? Is she still in the house? What is she doing?
Why did Michael disappear, and where is he hiding? Is he fearful for his life or simply trying to avoid a confrontation with UGIG? How has Michael changed since his newfound fortune? Does he still believe he was right to defraud UGIG or see himself as the victim? Is Michael dead? If so, did Lada, Olek, Koyla, or one of Olek’s “friends” murder him?
Diction
An author’s diction (or the linguistic choices used) is not easy to tame. Fiction writing has a fine line between how much technical jargon an author can give before the reader becomes confused. As shown below, I addressed this issue with the author:
Although most of the writing is easy to understand, readers will have a challenging time with the insurance terms if we cannot find a way to make the information easier to understand. Also, there should be some way to distinguish one type of insurance job from another. In chapter four, we know what CMA does and its reason for existence, and we assume the same is true for Charlotte’s company in chapter six. But what do the rest of the positions do? It will help the reader clarify this knowledge close to the beginning rather than later.
Assuming your audience understands some law terms and what appellate lawyers need to do in a case, most of the information given works on the law side of the novel. Not including the Latin terms, these are select words that might need some explanation before the audience truly gets their meaning.
Dialogue
The dialogue between characters always gives the reader a sign (whether small or like a billboard) about how a character feels at that moment. As shown below, I knew I needed to point this out clearly.
The biggest challenge will be how each character expresses themselves. Lada reverts to her Russian tongue while drunk and angry. Richard must move from speaking to clients and colleagues to discussions with his wife and children. Michael communicates differently with his wife than he does with businesspeople. All these types of dialogue must sound like the characters and reflect who they are.
Editorial Issues
An editorial issue pertains to the story’s details (outside of the characters themselves). To help address this, I asked the author a series of questions.
Who is your audience? Are you hoping for a general audience or to appeal to folks within a specific category? Which genre?
Which key points are you trying to get across? Do you know what they are? Does something sound like it is missing?
Are you having issues fleshing out the key points? Detail matters, but too much can overwhelm your readers. Too little leaves them in the dark.
Editorial Recommendations
Here is where we get to the meat of the editorial style sheet. Although I show only a part of the recommendations given to the author, this section ended up being over two pages. Again, this might not have been so long if I had been reading a finished manuscript. Here is an extract of the suggestions given to the author:
Here are my recommendations for the manuscript. Remember, you are welcome to ignore every suggestion, but the information provided here will help with the rest of the novel. As your editor, it is my job to view the manuscript from two sets of eyes: the editor and the future audience. All recommendations stem from these two viewpoints.
- The narrative structure of the manuscript should be the first step before continuing. As noted above, I have given the approximate dates for each scenario and on which pages they appear. Depending on how you decide to continue, specific dates will be essential (particularly during courtroom cases, where this sounds like it is heading).
- One of the more difficult things to discern while reading each chapter was where certain businesses and scenes occur.
- Richard is the primary character; therefore, he should appear in each chapter at least once (or more than only confined to two chapters).
- Outside of Charlotte Nichols (who we know for sure is dead), the same advice goes for Michael, Lada, Olek, and Vivian (and even B. J.).
- Descriptive details for each location used in the manuscript will enable your readers to build a spatial world in their heads while reading. They will feel more engaged with the material and not have to supply details that might not jive with what you, as the author, intend.
- Physical descriptions for your characters are equally important. We know basic details about Richard and Irene Ferris but little about anyone else.
- Answering the questions in the Character Development section should be a high priority.
- Within the Characterization section, the questions about Jacob Oxford are not as important as they are for Olek and Kolya.
- The conflict scenarios are what I see developing naturally from the six chapters.
- The consistency section follows the same advice for the fourth bullet noted above.
- Try to make insurance and legal terms easier to understand for the layperson.
Next Steps
An editor will always tell the author the next steps in the editing process, especially if they plan to collaborate with the author long-term (which happens to be the case with this client). Even if there is no long-term collaboration between the editor and author, there are still more steps to take before the project is complete. An editor who does not clearly articulate what should happen next is not doing her job.
I have asked a ton of questions for your consideration, and you may choose to address them all or none of them . . . These are the same questions I find myself asking while writing.
Please read and answer those questions you feel are most relevant to your story, and we will discuss the answers when I arrive sometime in April. When . . .
Final Remarks
Leaving a style sheet with the next steps does not round out the paperwork; it leaves it hanging like a broken branch. The author asked me to do a specific job (figure out if the book is worth writing). This was my response to her:
I think this will be a good novel. It sets the reader up for an intriguing story with fascinating characters, promises all sorts of drama, and keeps the reader interested from page one.
As you can see, a manuscript critique covers many topics (especially when unfinished). Yet, an author may want to have these questions and suggestions for their piece to self-analyze whether the project is worth pursuing. If the author is unsure whether they should continue the project, a manuscript critique might be what they need. If an author is confident that they have a good manuscript, they should progress to the next stage: developmental editing.
Until next time.
